This is coming from a guy who is very indecisive and hesitant, I can comfortably spend years weighing the pros and cons of a decision. And it does get really frustrating at times, it’s likely because I am a type of person who balances the cause and effect as well as the cost and rewards, and I still think it is wise instinct, it has kept me out of needless trouble throughout the years. And I thank whatever gods that gave me such keen spirit.
But this does have its downsides, and the biggest is an inherent lack of confidence, you would think going back and forth over a single subject will instill a deep sense of confidence and certainty in the mind of the introspective man, but plenty of times the reverse is the case and I have caught myself going down this black hole of useless brainstorming and indecisiveness.
The biggest purpose of me creating this blog is sharing with you introvert how to become a strong, respected, capable and successful individual “winning with silence” as I call it, I wish to urge you against pretending to be what you’re not ( most likely pretending to be an extrovert). It is tempting to want to imitate the extrovert and run away from who you are, I suspect that you have attempted this, I certainly have, and it didn’t work,it proved to be counterproductive and and I felt like a fake, and it’s this feeling of being a fraud that I couldn’t live with.
Fortunately, I didn’t go too far into the journey of erasing my natural strengths and nature given capabilities, but these are stories for another day,…. getting back on track with the purpose of this article;
The ability to make swift and sound decisions is an essential quality of a leader in fact you won’t find any great leader who is constantly indecisive, if there’s one, he has lost his followers or soon will, so no matter your personality, decisiveness is required for leadership position.
But on top of that, I have never met a man more attractive than a calm, quiet and cool man who can take quick carefully thought decisions in a confident and timely manner, trust me, such a man is hard to beat.
Even though a lot of times I still struggle with trusting my judgement or even making any judgement.
Let me now tell you what it feels like when I make a decision, I mean when my mind zeroes itself and turns its tunnel vision on and refuses to the see possibility of alternative options, something wonderful happens, something very difficult to put down in words, except that a feeling of life comes down upon me, I suspect that the spirit of my ancestors gaze down to give their nod of approval, it becomes impossible for me to acknowledge limits and I feel clarity in my soul.
Where there is a will there is a way, and I’m even positive that when you make a decision life itself conspires to make it happen.
Let me give you a short story; I met a new girl not too long ago, I wasn’t infatuated with her not specially attracted to her in any special way, I just wanted to have fun with her and I was in need of female companionship and validation, this girl got into the habit of demanding for money from me which is what always happens when you act needy with a woman, I acquiesced to her demands a couple of time but I knew deep inside that this was not who I was, I am not going to be buying the affection of a woman.
Anyway, she really got into this habit and didn’t hesitate to ask just like it was her right, about the fourth time of her bold demands of my hard earned money then without me really thinking about it before, my mind made the decision itself, I am not giving this chick a dime, not that I really wanted to lose her or hurt her feelings or make any point my mind just made a decision on my behalf and the message was passed across to every single part of me, and it didn’t matter if she would call it quits right then and there, now the interesting part of this story was that I normally would have been thinking of the appropriate action I should take or excuses I needed to make, it wasn’t so this time, I didn’t need to think of any action nor excuse, I have made the decision that would not change and that was all that mattered.
This story in itself is irrelevant, the point of note is that when I made the decision, what I needed to do was perfectly clear and simple, and that is pretty much what happens every time you make a decision from deep inside your heart, the steps you need to take become absolutely clear, what we need to do to get to where we want to get to in life are very clear simple and definite, just that we haven’t made the decision to get there, Time, difficulty, resistance, and setbacks means nothing. The decision is all that matters.
Peace!!
Strongly Introverted 